How do you accept yourself? Or do you? Did you learn that being good to yourself was selfish? I sure did! My mother constantly pointed out my "selfish" qualities.
Did you answer ‘No’ to the question? How many times did you hear you were bad girl or bad boy? Hear this often enough you begin to associate your core identity with your actions. Making self acceptance difficult in appreciating the "true" you.
How often did you hear these words: "Don’t tell her that, she’ll get a "big" head. You learned praising yourself or someone else praising you was wrong. Most of us growing up got the message loud and clear that praising ourselves or others would lead to ‘becoming conceited’ or ‘slacking off.’
The tragedy from this false belief is the very opposite is true. What you pay attention to expands. Self acceptance and appreciation of others is based on love and appreciation. In other words, as I am willing to love me, I am capable of loving you.
Much of us disguise our feelings of inadequacy through a tool called ‘constructive criticism.’ This form of for ‘your own good’ love actually let’s me artificially "puff" myself up by bringing you down.
I judge what you do and say based on my perceptions of "should." Then I tell you how to "do it right." Constructive criticism leads to feelings of inadequacy. Judging and rejecting yourself causes enormous pain
Unconditional love and self acceptance lead to feelings of self worth. Remember: the most important task you have is loving and accepting yourself.
What is Self Acceptance?
Self is defined as the entire person of an individual while acceptance defines an expression of admiration, approval, or gratitude. Self acceptance equates to saying: ‘I accept myself exactly as I am.’ It is about acknowledging our unique gifts and knowing within each of us is a highly creative, skilled being just waiting for discovery.
Self acceptance does not put others down or think yourself better; it means loving ourselves the way we came into the world. You in turn love others for themselves. Remember: I can only accept and love you if I can willing love and accept myself and acknowledge my own self worth.
The Dalai Lama states, "The purpose of our lives is to be happy." Happiness in my mind equates with joy. The joy, without which all other joy is diminished, is joy in one’s self. The cornerstone in determining your health, your success, and your abundance and prosperity in life comes down to one word: Self acceptance